Those words are not "I love you". It is the words that would make anyone stupid enough to devote so much of energy and time to someone else, and then that person goes back to the horrid life they used to have - feeling dumbfounded.
Every time you have something to tell me, I brace myself for those words. I am driving myself mad and paranoid by letting her ruin my life. I keep thinking she is waiting for my happy episode to come up, and then she'll pounce and tear it all up.
...This week itself I let my heart beat till it almost crashed. I know it will happen soon. It is a matter of time.
It will leave me speechless and I will be gone - habouring and licking on the wounds created by both of you. I don't know how can we be friends when she comes back into my life, directly or indirectly.
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