If I could tell you how I feel now, I would start by saying that I missed you so dearly today, and every night, I feel lonely without you to comfort me. The insecurity sweep over me and I feel the need to hear you. I cant stop thinking of you because I am so infatuated with you. I think I am falling for you..falling all over my heart. - No saint here -

It occurred to me that you mean a lot more to me than I can truly handle....and that's why I cannot give you an answer. 


At 4.29am on 21st March 2011, all I can think of is you. How you make me miss you so badly by playing my game. I think of you, I think of placing you in my life, trying to look for the space in my mind......after you have won my infatuation. 


I am overly infatuated with you, and when you asked me "Are you ready for it?", the question daunted me. How can I answer you when I have the answer in my mind, but my heart is screaming for me to beware? Or was it the other way round? Either way, you are a mistake I am willing to make. I would want for you to hold me at night, while I lay my lips on yours. I know you would love that. I just need to lose my heart, soul and mind to you completely.


You would know my answer to all your questions, if you read my blog. Till then, let's just be friends.


You are all over my life, my post.

Down The Light

I hope you feel this way, as depicted in Jason Walker’s “Down”.

I don't know where Im at
I'm standing at the back
And I'm tired of waiting
I'm waiting here in line
I'm hoping that I'll find
What I've been chasing

I shot for the sky
I'm stuck on the ground
So why do I try?
I know I'm gonna fall down.
I thought I could fly
So why did I drown?
I'll never know why 
Its coming down, down, down.

I'm not ready to let go
Cause then I'd never know
What I could be missing.
But I'm missing way too much
So when do I give up
what I've been wishing for?

I shot for the sky
I'm stuck on the ground
So why do I try?
I know I'm gonna fall down
I thought I could fly
So why did I drown?
I'll never know why
Its coming down, down, down.

Oh, I am going down, down, down.
I cant find another way around.
And I dont wanna hear that sound
Of losing what I never found.

I shot for the sky.
I'm stuck on the ground.
So why do I try?
I know I'm gonna fall down.
I thought I could fly
So why did I drown?
I'll never know why 
Its coming down, down, down.

I shot for the sky
I'm stuck on the ground
So why do I try?
I know I'm gonna fall down.
I thought I could fly
So why did I drown?
Oh, its coming down, down, down

And for you I feel Sara Bareilles’ “The Light”.

In the morning it comes heaven sent a hurricane
Not a trace of the sun but I don't even run from rain
Beating out of my chest, my heart is holding onto you
From the moment I knew
From the moment I knew

You were the air in my breath filling up my love soaked lungs
Such a beautiful mess intertwined and overrun
Nothing better than this, and then the storm can come
You feel just like the sun
Just like the sun

And you say
It'll be alright
I'm gonna trust you babe
Gonna look in your eyes
And you say it'll be alright
I'll follow you into the light

Never mind what I knew
Nothing seems to matter now
I'm lost without you, I can't do without
No one knows where it ends, how it may come tumbling down
But I'm here with you now
I'm with you now

And you say it'll be alright
I'm gonna trust you babe
I'm gonna look in your eyes
And you say
It'll be alright
I'll follow you into the light

That door would come rushing, come down hard, come crushing
All I need is right here beside me
My love I swear it
Take my love and wear it over your shoulders

And if you say
It'll be alright
I'm gonna trust you babe
Gonna look in your eyes
And you say it'll be alright
I'll follow you into the light

Missing you

I miss you as well, but for the sake of my sanity, I have chosen to ignore you.